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16 Comments

  1. I think there won’t be weddings/marriages in another 20 years..

    false dowry accusation cases
    wife trying to separate husband from his parents
    and ofcourse all the divine aspects like nagging, demanding, etc etc

    It needs to be thought that women need marriage and a partner commit (as a form of social security) a lot more than men.. men look younger for more years and they don’t have to bear children.. women have to reform or they are the loosers..

    1. @somebody: “Men look younger for more years”. You’re kidding, right? As for needing marriage for social validation, look around. We’re in 2011, not the 1800s.

  2. @Somebody: You make it sound like marriage is a cakewalk for women. Let me tell you some of what they have to face:
    Domestic Abuse
    Marital Rape
    Giving up career for family because that’s what ‘good’ women do
    Be apologetic for any kind of success

    In today’s world, a woman can achieve so much more if she doesn’t get married. And as for men looking younger for more years, even if that were true, the average indian man is so ugly that it makes no difference. And just to clarify, I am an Indian man.

    1. Ashwini – U r stupid. In today’s world – here is what a womans thinks – a woman has identity ONLY if she can step out of the 4 walls of the house and be a working member of the family. This is the ROOT cause of all evils. Women in workforce leade to all that you have listed above. So do you think a stay at home MOM has no identity just becuse she does not slip into sleezy outfits and zip through city streets content that she is workig., We should ALL roll back the the single wage earner days when everyone was happy – Have you EVER seen a dual working couple HAPPY – they hardly see each other – where is the damn time to be happy. In their lust for satisfying their own needs – they unknowingly ignore their own children. See a single income famliy and you will see how contended they are – with what they have.
      It is not what you have that matters – It is what you make out of what you have that matters.

      1. @Krish Rao: I’ll let Ashwini speak for himself. But for my part (and since this is my blog), “We should ALL roll back the the single wage earner days when everyone was happy ” – do you think women were all happy being stuck to conventional roles in the kitchen and bedroom? Or do you really believe that a woman has no mind of her own, no ambition, no dreams and no potential other than to be a daughter, sister, wife and mother? It intrigues me that your school of thought still flourishes at a time when most of us believe that women are indeed, an equal sex.

  3. @Krish Rao: Nothing elevates the standard of an intellectual debate like a statement that goes “U r stupid”. Thank you. And secondly these evils existed for years before women became a part of the workplace. I do not think a stay at home mom has no identity. But I also do not think a working woman has any less of an identity. They are both individuals who have made their own choices and should be respected for the same.

    As for single wage couples and double earning couples, i think it depends on the maturity of the man and woman in question. Having a unique professional identity is not the cause for unhappiness. And having a wife as a home-maker is no sure recipe for happiness either. It depends on each case and the maturity of the people involved.

    Your attitude hints you are resentful of successful women. Maybe you should think about that. Having a vagina should not exclude a person from having professional ambitions. Especially in a culture like ours where we elevate women to godesses.

    1. Yeah ! @Krish Rao A women is a human female. That doesnt mean she is fundamentally different from a man. Women can lead their own lives. Why do u think someone else should decide what is good for them.Even now i feel bad for my mom who has a Masters degree and a specialization yet shes a house wife. U dont decide for others ,remember its their life not urs.

      1. @Pruthvi krishna: I think the fact that there are people like you who are sensitive to this having seen women in their own lives sacrifice their potential, spells hope for the rest of us in this generation.

    2. @Krishna Rao. I’ve heard words similar to these spoke else where. I think it was a Taliban spiritual leader.

  4. And in other news, I think people should get married only if they feel like it – I’m being forced by my folks to get married purely cos “I’m gettin too old” or “All the ‘nice’ gals in our community will be taken ” n other such lame excuses… somehow nobody seem to b able to accept that I can say ‘Not’ to the ‘Knot’ just cos I don’t feel like it 🙂

    Again, I guess in the age of the other commenters here, it may b juvenile/simplistic for me to say tht both the genders simply complete each other n tht marriage shud b seen merely as two ppl just decidin 2 b thr fr each other as long as they’re happy with it…sure kids cn complicate a separation ..but I guess, at the end of the day, personal happiness shud b the drivin force.

    Me gt a buddy who’s folks lived separately ever since he ws a kid n refused to divorce ‘fr the sake of the kids’..nw, bout 15 years later, he still tells me tht he wishes they hd separated rather thn livin seperately n bitchin bout each other whnvr the kids visit ..they were nvr be thr fr the kids yet fight like mad whnvr they wr together wid the kids… sad really..

    Thought provoking read, IdeaSmith 🙂

    1. @R-A-J: I am sorry to hear about your friend. A number of people I know who have experienced troubled marriages (as children or as the spouses) say the same thing. But it isn’t an easy decision either way and you never know for certain if it was the right one. Thank you for visiting XX Factor and commenting. I hope to see you again on this space!