The Superhero Fiasco

A common joke doing the rounds a couple of years back was that the measure of a man’s love for his woman was his willingness to sit through a romcom (especially Sex & The City, Confessions Of A Shopaholic & the Twilight series). By that same logic, I think I’ve achieved the status of devotion since I’ve sat through numerous superhero movies (we won’t talk about such disasters as Predators here).

A few months ago, I was made to endure the rather horrible The Green Hornet. Last month there was Green Lantern. And this weekend, we were taken to meet Captain America. I say we because The Third Toothbrush is the boy’s partner in comicbook crime and his girlfriend was made to suffer the same fate as me.

I quite happily ascribe to the stereotype of the girl who doesn’t get superhero stories. Capes, chaddi-over-tights, secret identities & stupid ‘smart’ gizmos are things best left to the boys. Still, there has been a Batman Begins & The Dark Knight which films I’d watch even reruns of. There is room to appeal to the non-fanbase through the medium of cinema.Green Lantern, I’m afraid did not do that. The boy tells me that there’s way more to the character of the green jewel-toting superhero but I didn’t see any of that in the movie, which was only a couple of smartish lines & Ryan Reynolds in a creepy green face mask (that made him look eerily like Hrithik Roshan).

And then there was Captain America. I spent the first hour of the movie guffawing & ‘you-have-got-to-be-kidding-me’ ing and the remainder (nearly 2 more hours) shifting uncomfortably in the seats trying to fall asleep. Apparently this character was created as American propaganda but grew to story hero status through comics, a fact that’s referenced in the movie. I’m guessing the sepia feel to give it the authentic 1940s look was mighty appealing to a certain crowd too. But I struggled through the film, this even though I was flanked on either side by an enthusiastic fanboy supplying extraneous details & pointing out references. It just wasn’t an entertaining movie. Picking a popular theme does not guarantee a good movie. I just call it lazy film-making & a film-maker who tests my patience this way pushes me from indifference into outright loathing.

I spent much of the last hour, ready to bolt. But noooo! Every potential end stretched into another extension! And finally, when the credits began rolling, I almost couldn’t believe my good luck. And then again, my hopes were crushed cruelly. We were made to sit through the 15-minute credit rolling, watching the names of every spotboy & extra (Lady with dog, man in trenchcoat 1, man in trenchcoat 2). All for a 5-second trailer of the upcoming Avengers movie that has apparently been tagged on to the end of every Marvel comics movie of the recent years. The boy & BBB maintain that it was worth it. Well, let’s see what they say when we’re buying 4 tickets for the next Shopaholic movie.