Gaslighting

Slime

by IdeaSmith
It seems like I’ve healed every few weeks or months or years. “You’re sounding a lot better since that one conversation of ours in the coffeeshop” says one friend. And I believe it because I want to. I must. Forgetting (somedays I call it self-deluding) is an integral survival skill. I don’t know if it ... Read More

All That You’re Not

by IdeaSmith
Don’t hang yourself on the noose of someone else’s attachment. It’s nice to feel needed but nice is an illusory trap. You are the sand and the ash inside a dormant volcano. You won’t be held inside a fist or even an embrace that breaks at the first sign of heat. Do not shatter over ... Read More

Storytellers On The Streets – Musicians & Me

by IdeaSmith
Gully Boy was rife with triggers for me. For one, it’s about a rapper and everything that starts with rap will always remind me of the person who changed my life when he walked (rapped?) his way into it in 2010. At a less intense but still supporting-the-triggers way, the story is based on the ... Read More

I’m Calling Bullshit on Quote-Unquote ‘Woke’ Fuckbois

by IdeaSmith
Before I load and fire, let me tell you who I’m aiming at. This is not all polyamorous couples or even all men (yes, yes, MRAs, you’ve been acknowledged, now GTFO my blog). This is the ‘Woke’ man and please note the quote signs to indicate the derision with which I approach this species. ‘Woke’ ... Read More

The Hidden Politics Of Book Discussion

by IdeaSmith
I follow this blog-in-Facebook-updates called LABYRINTHS. Its picture-stories trigger off ideas, feelings and on occasion, memories. Today’s story is titled The IVORY BOOK CLUB and is a conversation between two people about the quality of literature. It felt like an instant frame capture from my own life and here’s what happened in the real story. ... Read More

My #MeToo Checklist

by IdeaSmith
1. Fondled by music teacher and made to touch him – CHECK 2. Breasts mauled by tailor while friend watched and apologised to him for having to leave his shop early – CHECK 3. Had to sit through ‘non-veg jokes’ by MBA college professor for fear of being thrown out – CHECK 4. Groped at ... Read More

Fuckboys & The Support Fuckboys Brigade

by IdeaSmith
I saw the fuckboi yesterday. He is part of the same circles and I refuse to acknowledge him anymore so his presence in isolation is not such a bother. But I am surrounded by his manipulative behaviour, in the form of other women who look as starry-eyed as I *cringe* probably did back in December. (Notice ... Read More

SHHH, Loud Is Not Ladylike

by IdeaSmith
I was at dinner with three male friends yesterday. We were at a tiny, local restaurant known more for its cheap, tasty food than its ambience or refinement. All around us were people in groups talking, laughing and eating. The proprieter sat at one of the tables counting money while the waiters buzzed in and ... Read More

Old Healed Wounds That Ache In Bad Weather

by IdeaSmith
At the Performance Poetry workshop I attended yesterday, we looked at some videos of performers. One of them had a few notes playing in the background and the performer speaking in a characteristic singsong, often-rhyming style. I blurted out, “But that’s rap!” The others smiled and told me that rap was quite close to spoken ... Read More

Why Are Period Jokes Okay But Period Talk Not?

by IdeaSmith
*Image courtesy Simon Howden on FreeDigitalPhotos.net When I was in college, a guy leaned in and asked me, “Why was there blood on the dance floor?” These were the late 90s, Micheal Jackson was still alive, already white and not yet branded a pedophile. I shrugged. I had not understood the song anyway. “Because Susie ... Read More