This post was written on Christmas Day, 2020.

This picture is one of the last ones taken in December 2019. I had a Christmas Eve date (hence the colour theme). It was with someone I’d matched with on the same day I had a run-in with my past. I would get pulled into a complicated whirl of the latter. So with some hesitation, I told my match over our first date (drinks for Diwali). He gave me a cheerful hug & told me to look him up again if things didn’t work out. They didn’t.

My usual Christmas Eve routine for years has been to attend midnight mass at my old school church. But 2019 had been such a hard year, I didn’t feel like looking backwards anymore. So in a fit of bravado, I texted him, “Remember me?”. He did.

It was an evening of roasts & toasts. Of swapping Mumbai December memories & creating some new Christmastime ones. We haven’t met after that. Maybe that was just the year leaving me a little parting gift. He’d probably chuckle to hear me call him Santa’s elf.

I know just like birthdays, 1 January 2021 is not going to herald a magical reprieve from the 2020 we’ve had. It’s just another date on another calendar. One year closer to death. And we’ve all seen so much of it, up close & personal, it really does feel closer.

Can this mean we’re also closer to life? To valuing the brave new future we’ve survived into? Surviving our meeting & living to tell the tale. That would be a really nice parting gift. Cheers to that.

#IWear: Red chanderi saree + striped pullover + handknit tote + booties #SareeStyle

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