Twitter Gandhigiri

I’m having fun with Twitter. It’s everything that blogging was supposed to be but more. No more ‘mine is better than yours’ conversations about readers (followers?) and such things. No one is hopelessly obsessed with their Twitter accounts. I haven’t heard of TEO (Twitter Engine Optimisation) though it’ll be nice if the Twitter server (being the only Twitter Engine I can think of) can be optimised enough to not have downtimes after every 20 tweets. No one is having serious-sounding conferences on how to ‘monetize’ their tweets. At least no one I know. As yet.

And in the middle of this jolly melee, comes a newcomer. Exactly like the way one enters a crowded room, drifts through various conversations and then manages to incorporate oneself into some of these…on Twitter, it takes awhile, saying interesting things in 140 characters, to get involved in conversations and acquire followers (does anyone actually set up a Twitter account with the ambition of having ‘x’ number of followers?).

Of course there’s always someone who tries to take a shortcut. Someone who turns up in a bizarre costume or arrives with a parade in tow. Or someone who comes armed with gobs of mud and starts to systematically throw these at everyone around.

Twitter’s very own such social anomaly is @tbitch. For convenience I’m going to assume that this person is female. Her profile says,

Twitter is a hypocrite place, call me twitter bitch if you will.

Her tweets are one never-ending rant about everyone I know on Twitter from taking potshots to saying plain nasty things. Much to her chagrin though, most people seem to be ignoring her.

I say, let’s be generous and give the poor thing a real welcome. Attention is obviously what she wants so let’s give it to her. What’s more, let’s be real nice here and extend the red carpet to her. Since our new guest seems to be rather impoverished in matters of originality and a sense of humour, let us share some of ours with her.

Come join the charity drive in honour of @tbitch
who suffers deeply from a lack of a sense of humour and originality.

Share a funny joke (not a mean one)
or an original idea with her at @tbitch.

You will have done your bit to help the underprivileged on Twitter. Go in peace (and a touch of mirth). 😉