This post was written on Christmas Day, 2020. This picture is one of the last ones taken in December 2019. I had a Christmas Eve date (hence the colour theme). It was with someone I’d matched with on the same day I had a run-in with my past. I would…
I turned 21 in a world that promised much even for an averager like me. Then a plane flew into the twin towers & all millenium dreams crumbled. Things they never teach you about in a boom economy b-school: how to spell RECESSION. I landed a job, found harassment, ran…
Remember the emotional breakdown scene in QUEEN where Kangana bemoans wandering the streets of Paris by herself instead of with the new husband are thought she’d have? I thought I’d have a wedding & a honeymoon in December 2012. I didn’t. They turned out to be fairytales, the kind that never turn into achievable dreams.
It could be a lot of things. Commitment. A bribe. A power game. Love? Not necessarily. And there are things that have got nothing to do with sex. Like good looks. Religion. Rebellion. Daddy issues. Mommy issues. Alcohol. Everybody has a problem with sex. This is because everybody has problems….
Some of us need to learn how to be loved. How to receive warmth & not fear burns. How to forget that trembling alone, arms wrapped around ourselves, is not the same thing as being held. How to feel without flinching. How to change a body rhythm that only beats…
I hope you find lessons in your reflection and I hope these lessons come to you easy.
A new year is under way after all the things that 2020 was. Are we ready to let it go? Or are we still clinging to our wounds?
When people say the word ‘love’, I usually recoil. I say that’s a real big word, one I don’t really know how to say. My language is rooted in past experiences & it pulls up memories of difficult feelings when it registers the word love. And then there are moods…
Glorification and shame are two sides of the same coin. They allow us to distance ourselves from these uncomfortable feelings & make them everyone else’s problem.
Can we hate people for being who they are? It can be hard watching people remain their worst selves when you can see their highest potential. It’s difficult finding pettiness, rage, envy, weakness in those you know to be wise, strong, sensitive. Weaponising emotion is to turn something beautiful into a smoking gun.