Manguide 1: Cities & Towns

Here are my stereotypes of the men I seem to keep coming against. Presenting the first edition of Manguide:

The Bangalore guy: Ah, this one is my favourite by far. He’s not as snazzy as the Dilli chappy, not as driven as the Mumbaiker and way too laid back to be the staid Chennai-ite. He seems to give off the air of enjoying being dominated, which I as a Mumbai girl, excel at. On the other hand, one of my dear friends from Bangalore described Rahul Dravid as

The typical Bengaluru boy….goodlooking and so duhhhh

I don’t know if that is true but ah well, I like them anyway. Maybe I’m chauvinistic.

The Chennai boy: Very polite and courteous but he doesn’t open doors or pull out chairs for me…he doesn’t seem to realize that’s what passes for chivalry in some places. He also apologizes each time a friend of his mentions alcohol or meat. And then after a long conversation with this Mumbai girl, he figures he should treat her like one of the guys so he lets me in on the secrets of his booze binges and parties, cooking chicken in buckets behind the hostels. I find all of that very funny but I’m not in the least bit amused to know that he thinks of me as the wild, wanton Mumbai girl….and tells his family (and soon my family) that.

Mumbaiker: I wanted to call this an alliteration-ical ‘Mumbaicha mulga‘ but I realize that this species cannot be called a boy. These are the babies born with wheels on their feet. I love this city and its madmen alike but I wish that they would have some time to think about things other than work and success. I get along well with this type since I am their female counterpart. Still, birds of a feather do not flock together always….and I am rather bored by these men inhabiting the same self-centered islands that I do, believe that the sun rises and sets in Mumbai.

Dilliwallas: Aaaarrrggggghhh….I loathe this type and not just because the worst of my exes was one of these. Objectively speaking, look for the smoothest shaven cheeks, the suavest talker….the one who knows all the right moves and how to charm you (Mumbaiker would reduce all that faff to the functional ‘patao-tactics’). The reason I do not like this type is that they’re so blatantly MCP and that for all their polished English and modern clothes, I get the sneaky suspicion he admires my figure more than my intellect, that when he compliments my hairstyle, he’s just imagining that its easier to drag me by the hair into the bushes. I do have a few friends of this variety but the reason they stay friends is that they have not tried the above tactics on me…..which brings me to the conclusion that Dilliwallas are very focused when it comes to women and don’t waste their time (and charm) on leads going nowhere.

The all-over-the-place: For whatever reason, I haven’t been in a relationship with anyone who fits this type. But I am enormously fascinated by them. I think they’re very lucky for the multi-exposure that they have. I find that they are usually easy to get along with, and quieter with no burning need to express their opinions. Perhaps that’s why I haven’t dated them as yet.

The non-metros: Some of my close friends are from the non-Mumbai, Delhi, Kolkata, Bangalore, and Chennai places. Several from cities and towns which are nonetheless not metros. I like them but I wish sometimes that they wouldn’t try so hard to prove they’re like me…..it isn’t such a great thing to be a citizen of the metros. Easy for you to say…one of them said. But he’s the one who saw poetry in the high-rises here while I could only see concrete jungles…..in my mind that makes him a higher-order human being than me. Oh, if only he understood!

What’s missing? Kolkata….ah….I have never visited this city or dated anyone from here. But updates will be up, when applicable! I don’t t know too many people from places other than the ones mentioned here so input would be much appreciated!