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7 Comments

  1. Hey
    Just wanted to drop in and say hello when I read through all the older entries. All I can say is that kudoes to you for standing up for your principles. Even against love. It takes a lot of self belief to do that.
    Hope you are doing fine now.
    Love and hugs

    1. @Lakshmi: Thank you, love. I missed writing, of course but I didn’t realize how much I missed connections, even ones like this that happen over distances.

  2. I have been following your blog ever since the 30’s diary entry.I can so relate to this entry.While my inlaws did not ask for dowry,there were a lot of other demands and one of their unreasonable demand was also that we take up the entire wedding and reception expenses.My then bf and now husband while theoretically agreeing to “equality” did not fight his parents too hard until i pushed him.And that was very heartbreaking and disappointing since I thought we shared the same ideals and not just in “theory”…..But yeah,atleast to give him credit,he finally did stand up for us and fought….

    1. @R: I had the same situation. Dowry isn’t just a list of items demanded to be paid over before the wedding. It’s also that sense of superiority in being ‘ladkewaale’ and assuming that any kind of behaviour is okay. It’s also such statements like “The girl’s side is supposed to take care of this, you know.” (which prefaced every discussion in my case). No one wanted to touch the dirty D word but all of these were clear & present. And the engagement ended a couple of weeks later. That’s a big, fat bloody ugly elephant called DOWRY that kicked this relationship into the garbage, as far as I’m concerned.