Self-Respect

I hate my self today.
Didn’t call when I said I would
Basked in a compliment I knew I didn’t deserve
Smiled and fumed internally after I promised I wouldn’t react
Haven’t done oodles of chores that I should have completed months ago
Stayed in bed when the doorbell rang so someone else would get it
Brooded over the ten times I broke my promise to someone
And didn’t once think of how I said I wouldn’t worry and still did anyway
Am typing this when I’m supposed to be preparing for a meeting tomorrow
Am thinking about what ‘they’ have done for me when I haven’t done much for them either
Am rationalizing saying I’m human.
Damn…wish I could get over beating up on myselfhttps://ramyapandyan.com/category/home-identity

The quality of mercy isn’t strained
It droppeth as gently as the falling rain

Whoever thinks of being merciful or emphatic with oneself?
It’s only self-pity…that’s all it always is. Damn…..

Weird but I feel better now.