Some Lessons I’ve Learnt

Intention: Happiness
Declaration: I will accept and embrace change.
Action: Experiment with the unknown – a new job, a new kind of relationship, a new me
Observation: Stressed out, irritable, often confused
Realisation: Doesn’t work for me
Confession: I am a chronic clinger
Decision: End the damn experiments
Conclusion: Changing direction in hope that it will lead you somehow to your destination is fruitless. Figure out what the destination is first.

Intention: True love
Declaration: I will not be selfish, egoistic or scared in my search.
Action: Trust and believe in a person who ‘speaks’ to my heart
Observation: Jealousy, power struggles, fear, lot of tears
Realisation: Its an awful relationship but I rather stay than leave
Confession: I am dead afraid of being alone
Decision: Get out of situation and think, think, think
Conclusion: Loneliness isn’t a good reason to get into a relationship.

Intention: Success
Declaration: I will be unwavering and do all it takes to achieve my goal
Action: Slog like hell, ignore temptations and little voices in my head, claw my way to the top
Observation: Fatigue, insomnia, dark circles under the eyes, moodiness, short temper, cynicism
Realisation: Its a great job and I hate it
Confession: My whole life right now is one big status symbol
Decision: Drop the facade
Conclusion: There is just this long you can fool yourself that pleasing others is the same thing as being fulfilled.

Intention: Peace
Declaration: I will curb my temper and my baser instincts
Action: Count to ten when I’m angry, bite back the sarcasm, smile when I want to scream and with great effort, keep my voice steady and even
Observation: Little lines all over my face, a tendency to brood, morosity
Realisation: People are taking advantage of my good nature….and the damn thing doesn’t even exist!
Confession: I feel like a dumb bird, all trussed up and inside a cage with a cloth over it
Decision: Let it all out.
Conclusion: When it comes down to it, I just gotta be me, there’s no better way to be.

3 thoughts on “Some Lessons I’ve Learnt

  1. Couldn’t have said it better.
    Bottomline (which fascinatingly is at the very bottom of your post): When it comes down to it, I just gotta be me, there’s no better way to be.

    That’s the one thing I hold myself (and others) to at any given time – being yourself. The rest just magically falls in place.

    Wonderfully written!

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