People & Relationships

Navigating Family, Friendship, Marriage, Colleagues, Companions & other social connections

Reluctantly Seeking Shah Rukh Fans
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Reluctantly Seeking Shah Rukh Fans

I visited North India (Himachal Pradesh & Chandigarh) this week. The last time I was there was in 2018, pulled abruptly out of an impending midlife crisis & looming health scares to cremate an unexpectedly deceased relative. I’ve never liked the mountains. My only associations with them have been under…

The Unloving Wanting
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The Unloving Wanting

I wonder if we fall a little too much in love with stories, especially ones we write ourselves. It’s a fallacy to call this love because this is an uncontrollable, desperate, choking stranglehold that is not loving, nurturing or caring. Love is not blind; it makes our vision clearer, if…

Punks & Cheese
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Punks & Cheese

You are made for instant love stories,for picture-perfect odes,for sweet-scented songs,for candy smiles& dimple kisses I carry a pen dipped in bloodA shiv serves a chalkas I punk upa symmetric story& make it minewith a sweaty handprint Which is why I say nomore often than hell yes!(the only yes I…

Lemonade
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Lemonade

Little bits of crueltydrop off your wordslike ice shardsoff a glass of nimboopanithat still has a sliver or twoof lemon floating in itย And I hesitate to point it out I want to pick it out of your beingBefore you taste your own sournessBefore you have to swallowyour imperfectionsAnd before the…

๐—ช๐—›๐—ฌ ๐—ฌ๐—ข๐—จ ๐——๐—œ๐——๐—ก’๐—ง ๐—–๐—”๐—Ÿ๐—Ÿ ๐—ง๐—›๐—˜ ๐—ก๐—˜๐—ซ๐—ง ๐——๐—”๐—ฌ
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๐—ช๐—›๐—ฌ ๐—ฌ๐—ข๐—จ ๐——๐—œ๐——๐—ก’๐—ง ๐—–๐—”๐—Ÿ๐—Ÿ ๐—ง๐—›๐—˜ ๐—ก๐—˜๐—ซ๐—ง ๐——๐—”๐—ฌ

When you kiss a friend,they leak out of the chais, cappuccinos, white wines & long island iced teas & camaraderiepast the milestones of recognitionwhere the light switch flicks on in your mind& your friendship mode self turns onand that feels like it would look uncomfortableBut it’s notand you, overarticulate you,…

Gehraiyaan: A Good Galentine’s Day Release & An Okay Solo Date Watch
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Gehraiyaan: A Good Galentine’s Day Release & An Okay Solo Date Watch

Spoiler alert: This post talks about the film Gehraiyaan & references several key plot points. If you haven’t seen the film & plan to, please do not read further. Trigger warnings: Childhood neglect, self-harm, abuse, infidelity. ~O~O~O~O~O~O~ Yes, I said that. I know today is Valentine’s Day & this film…

Talking About Love With You
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Talking About Love With You

You tell me this is what it means to loveYou say that is love, this is lovingYou point me to poetryas a dictionary for the love languageAnd therapy terminologyto dissect this feeling These my friend,are conversations about love,Not love itself(And note, that I call you ‘friend’,not ‘my love’)Because I’ve read…

A Peach For Breakfast
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A Peach For Breakfast

My Clubhouse room prompt for this week via fellow host Tareque Laskar was SPELLBOUND. For this I cheated (slightly) and blended two of my old posts together. It was an interesting exercise, personally than for my writing since one of the posts was written 15 years ago. I remember feeling…

When Abandonment Wounds Are Your Teacher
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When Abandonment Wounds Are Your Teacher

There comes a point when you have to act like the person who left you will never come back. It’s essential to accept it in order to seek healing. But at some point, you must also ask yourself that if they do return, whether you’ll take them back. That’ll tell…

Love Gardener
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Love Gardener

We have to separate the feeling from the person who inspires them. We are so literal, we use the words “my love” to describe a sentiment as well as a person. But our feelings are entirely our own, to process, to draw from for poetry, to express in our ways,…

People Who Married Too Early
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People Who Married Too Early

In my 20s, I battled the Forced FOMO of Marriage. I didn’t feel I was missing out. There were so many other exciting things to pursue: fulfilling career, confidence-boosting style, enriching social life, so many hobbies. My then-friends began assaults on my life choices. I was made to pick a…

You Are In Our Conversations
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You Are In Our Conversations

I talk to my friends about you. It used to be with shame till they told me it was nice hearing me sound this way. I tell them the things about you that move me to pieces. The shards I didn’t know were sore till you touched them. (we debate…

The Unbearable Kitsch Of A Kundera Life
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The Unbearable Kitsch Of A Kundera Life

This is the book that set me on the cultural stereotype path that I would live out for the next 16 years (and still going?). The people I hungered to be around in the 2000s (MNC-employed, literature spouting, pretension-grooming) spoke eloquently about Milan Kundera and Haruki Murakami. Of course many…

A Rather Long Monologue But It’s Poetic
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A Rather Long Monologue But It’s Poetic

Loving and being loved are two entirely different, independent human experiences. We are not taught either. If we’re lucky both of them are modeled for us in clear, unambiguous ways. But I live in a culture of overpopulation & poverty where the very act of survival is the biggest achievement…

Love Language
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Love Language

LOVE LANGUAGE – my journey deciphering my experiences through the words of love songs in different languages

Where’s The Flirty Party?
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Where’s The Flirty Party?

Flirting feels like a massive party I haven’t been invited to. A concert that’s playing all around me & everyone’s vibing to it, except me. I can’t hear it, I can’t see it. I can pick up when people are attracted to me but that’s from years of being the…

Decoding Desire
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Decoding Desire

Desire puts us in the space of seeing what we need, what we yearn for. And this, right now after a long period of starvation & loneliness & desolation is shadowy. The needs are real but are they deep or transient? Will they vanish like FOMO the minute they are…

๐Ÿ„บ๐Ÿ„ฐ๐Ÿ„ป๐Ÿ„ด๐Ÿ„ธ๐Ÿ„ณ๐Ÿ„พ๐Ÿ…‚๐Ÿ„ฒ๐Ÿ„พ๐Ÿ„ฟ๐Ÿ„ด      ๐Ÿ„ป๐Ÿ„พ๐Ÿ……๐Ÿ„ด
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๐Ÿ„บ๐Ÿ„ฐ๐Ÿ„ป๐Ÿ„ด๐Ÿ„ธ๐Ÿ„ณ๐Ÿ„พ๐Ÿ…‚๐Ÿ„ฒ๐Ÿ„พ๐Ÿ„ฟ๐Ÿ„ด ๐Ÿ„ป๐Ÿ„พ๐Ÿ……๐Ÿ„ด

Do I have the courage to be loved by that which is bigger than me? Yes, it’s a question of courage. Also of ego. The spiritual masters say that love is a lesson in your own projections & insights on your being that appear as reflections in the beloved. I…

~B~L~U~E~ or A Rejection Of Romance
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~B~L~U~E~ or A Rejection Of Romance

His voice holds me. His words unravel me. And the trouble is the unraveling, the undoing, the blurring continue long after the voice has gone silent, the line cold. Because words, they linger. Burning flesh wounds inside defenses. And everything else feels harder, sharper, steelier. I am in a world…

The Political Is Personal
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The Political Is Personal

Activists with sincerity on their tongues, burning eyes & tearful hearts. They set mine afire. I register the call of their wild cries, in the pounding in my ears. Eloquent speakers do the same. They tease out the primal me. I’ve railed against patriarchy. At my loudest, I was screaming…